"It's Precise. What You Have To Do Is Really Precise."

Auto-course showings today of the 'kick in the arse' gag. Philippe made a joke that with only six groups the class would be short, but I assured him that they are all very long and very good. He asked how I knew this and I joked that I wrote and directed all of them. So this became the joke of the day...

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Nicko, Cat and Jonathan did a great number in which they did endless little signals and high fives to each other and the audience. "This one is a number of three clowns who don't know what to do." He then got them to do the 'kick in the arse' number which they had dropped in favour of following the game which was working for them. Again with their number they had a great connection with the audience and were very funny. 

"With the three actors together, they are very good."

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Simone, Miwa and Connor's number was rushed. The 'kick in the arse' bit was too quick (we need a nice big build-up)...however Connor was incredibly funny with a problem that arose from his roll of toilet paper attached to his waist (his costume is a boy scout) which kept unravelling which led him to keep tucking bits of paper in his many pockets.

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Tessa, Sophie and Boris didn't get the mechanics right for the scene, but were still funny with their misunderstanding (although unfortunately Boris didn't even get a go to go on).

"We need to see the face of the person who gets kicked."

"She receives the kick, and after...illumination! 'I'm going to do that to another friend.'"

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Mark, Hannah and Miluka did a fantastic number which started off with a false start. Hannah was the boss and tried to get the other two clowns to go back off stage, but Mark, playing a complete idiot (like somebody with a brain the size of a pea) couldn't figure out what he was supposed to do.

The only thing he knew was to run around a circle. And he kept trying to do that, and Hannah kept trying to convince him otherwise. It was hilarious. And the game continued with Hannah trying to signal to Mark inconspicuously with her eyes what he was supposed to do, but Mark still had no idea. Just a dimwit idiotic (yet naïve and loveable) look on his face. "It's fantastic...nothing works in this couple." Philippe warned that a clown couple is never negative. They are always friends. Even if one of them is incredibly frustrating and stupid, he is still loved by his partner.

Most of all I was happy for Mark. It was a brilliant day for him. His best, I'm sure. We adored him and he played so well. Subtle and listening.

"Him as an idiot...he is expensive...we love him as an idiot."

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"You need to have one number with one idea. After you come back with another number."

"It's precise. What you have to do is really precise."

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Finally Liz and Katie and I did our auto-course scene. We had rehearsed a bit throughout the week but didn't work too much. Just got the shape of it and decided to try and find a game on stage. But that didn't happen! At first we came out to run in a circle and Katie forgot to put on her red nose. Philippe asked me, the director/writer (joke continued), to tell her to put on her nose. So I screamed at her like a hot-tempered director. A bit of a laugh. We started again. But this time Liz decided not to wear her red nose. I yelled again. A bit of a laugh. And then we went to our scene, but I was a bit heavy and negative (carried over from the yelling) and we had no complicité. I kind of tried to play the boss - as if everything was going wrong - but didn't do it with lightness and fun. When it came to the kick Liz played that it actually really hurt - which worried me because I thought I really had hurt her. That created a worse feeling in the audience. Then Katie came out and the scene was no better. "Fucking fucking boring." So quite a disaster.

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I'm feeling a bit unmotivated about the course at the moment. I'm not giving up, but I'm not caring as much as perhaps I should be. I guess I just feel like Clown is not something that comes naturally to me at all and so I don't feel like it's that productive to be working hard on writing numbers. Rather, I'm happy just watching others and enjoying giving things a go without expecting too much. I accept that I need to stick with the basics for now. Feeling the flop. Keep searching. And I'm happy with that. I only have four more weeks at this school, and in Paris, and I'm just enjoying it without too much stress or worry.