"Guy, I Would Work With You...I Would Say You Need To Be Less Secure...It Means A Bit Less Pretentious...But You Have A Good Quality."

Last day of the Bouffon workshop today. And the last day of a two year journey for many of us too.

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Lee and Sam presented their When You Wish Upon A Star AIDS scene again but this time with adjustments from yesterday's direction towards showing more beauty. But this time, without the fun rhythm that Lee had in the background, it felt sentimental and boring. Philippe said "it needs a style" which he clarified as meaning "we recognise it's not like in the street."

[It means] "I have something special because you are in the room."

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Tim tried his Farewell song again with more stillness and subtlety. But it was "too boring." It's such a fine line going from beautiful and sensitive to slow and boring.

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Duncan and Sam tried the Eve and the Devil text again, this time fast and 'happy' - with Sam eating an apple and them laughing together.

But it wasn't accepted as it was "not subtle at all."

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Mike also scored himself a 'passage' - a quick scene walking across the stage. He comes on, stops and says "Toronto is not Miami", and then walks off. Yay for Mike!

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At the end of class Philippe spoke to each of us individually like he did at the end of last year (this was requested by one of us). It was awkward though. The whole last day was a bit awkward with Philippe really. And he didn't remember how he had spoken last year. And he suggested that he could say who in the class he would have in his company if he had a theatre company, which we decided we didn't want! Not at the end of two years! Say something nice! He ended up speaking about each one of us as actors and where we are at, and for some he said whether he would have us in his company or not.

"Guy, I would work with you...I would say you need to be less secure...it means a bit less pretentious...but you have a good quality."

pre·ten·tious   /priˈtenCHəs/

Adjective: Attempting to impress by affecting greater importance, talent, culture, etc., than is actually possessed.

For some people, at the end of two years training they are still feeling lost and unsure of themselves as actors. 

"Crisis is good...the best job for crisis is theatre."

That can totally happen at this school. It's not one to build you up and let you fly when you graduate. It's not a nurturing kind of place like some other drama schools. This one is tough and honest. And that can be good for learning, but it can also be really hard when you're trying to gain confidence in yourself.

"You have to work a lot to learn the job."

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The show tonight was another good one. There was a really nice, proud, and together feeling and we went out with a bang. 

After class we had some celebratory drinks and nibbles upstairs. There were a few speeches (Philippe joked that he would think of all of us for the rest of his life) and then wham it was all over. Very sudden. It was strange to end so abruptly. There was no stretched out graduation week like I had at Toi Whakaari. And we didn't really have any ritual to say thank you and goodbye. We did have a nice get together as a company before we played the last show, but it was very short. And then after the show we did have a kind of ritual by all partying on the train on the way to drinks by the Seine. But it was hard to find a fitting way to mark the end of this two year journey for many of us. Partly because the group who have done the whole two years are relatively small compared to the whole group. Most of the group have only been here for the year, or even just one workshop. So unfortunately the end wasn't marked very well. But in a way that is to be expected at a school like this. A school that thrives on fun and spirit, but ignores feelings and emotion. It's odd for me as well because I'm not done yet. I have three months off and then I'm back for one last workshop: Clown. So I find myself saying goodbye to a lot of close friends and reminiscing about the past two years, but I'm not saying goodbye to the school. I'm back in October. But I know that the school I return to will not be the same school anymore. Because the people won't be there - it will be a completely new group. Which is exciting! But also sad. Because I love the people I've trained with over the past two years. We have become close friends, and shared many memorable moments. 

But this is the life of somebody who works in the theatre I suppose. We come together for a certain amount of time and then we all split off again and go in different directions. There is always a goodbye.  And although it will be almost impossible to get everybody in the same room again (although there is talks of a ten year reunion in Paris!) now I have a bunch of friends situated all over the world who I can go and visit and call on when I need help! So thank you my core group of friends who I have done the two years with - André, Christine, Mia, Vicky, Katy, Sophia, Thomas, Stephanie, Mike - it's been incredible.

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Things I've Learnt From Bouffon:

• Say something - and be clear about what you want to say.

• Use tactics - seduce your audience and then pull the carpet from underneath them.

• Be nasty and go far - and then go further...destroy!

• Blaspheme and be vulgar - but do it with a purpose.

• Show yourself, your beauty and your humanity -  not a character or an idea.

Another really inspiring workshop. I've never done something quite like Bouffon. It's raw and political and powerful. It feels new and fresh and exciting. Something I definitely want to use in my work in the future.

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And now three and half months off before Clown. First up I'm going to Leeds to direct Ben, Lee, and Steve in a comedy version of Macbeth. Then Amanda and I are off to Berlin (where we'll see Rosie), Prague, Vienna (where we'll hang with Thomas), Edinburgh (for a week of the Fringe Festival), and then a month working in Montesquieu-Volvestre at a HelpX apple orchard.

Montesquieu-Volvestre

I'm also running a workshop with Ben in Burley-In-Wharfedale, as well as doing two weeks of our new street show The French Chefs at the Pompidou, which we did our first trial run-through for the public just recently.

À Octobre!

"We Have To See The Soul Of The Actor."

Katy, Tim, Lee, and Ben presented a number called The Fashion of the Christ in which they mocked the rich upper class catholic church figures for wearing flash jewelry and living expensive lives instead of living the way Jesus preached about. I featured in a cameo at the end as my latin-priest saying "Gucci, Versace, Dolce et Gabbana, Yves Saint Laurent, Armaaaaaniiii."

It wasn't clear what they were trying to say, and they didn't seem to sure exactly what they wanted to say either, and so it didn't work. 

"You blaspheme to say something to people. Not for nothing."

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Mike presented his Canadian Mayor number about the bicycles again, playing a serious method actor. But Philippe said "absolutely no... not Bouffon."

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Barbara presented a number in French as prostitute but Philippe said "c'est une merde."

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Duncan and Sam presented their number again with Sam in the trolley and Duncan pushing her in his straitjacket, this time more 'happy' - but it was too much. It wasn't really happy. It was hyper. And, understandably as they'd only learnt the text yesterday, they didn't know the text well enough.

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Christine presented a walk-by 'passage' number, in which she strolled across the stage smoking a cigar to the theme tune from The Godfather, and said "I'll give you a job, if you give me a blowjob." She was attacking Berlusconi. It was fun, and although it was really short we liked her...but Philippe said no.

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Vicky and Mia presented another iteration of their scene in which Vicky talks about the importance of teaching children strong morals...whilst whacking her over the head with a bible. Philippe said no saying that we love them in their Swiss scene, but here we don't love them, so it's unacceptable.

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Tim, as his transvestite, presented Philippe's text of "Forward, forward, take a look at the face of those who didn't come" in the style of a song at a bad cabaret. Philippe worked with Tim to be more simple, slow, and still, so that we can see him.

"We have to see the humanity...the beautiful face of this guy who suffered...we have to see the soul of the actor and not the beautiful idea...the beautiful idea is for idiots."

"The Bouffon is something fantastic from the soul of the actor."

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Sam and Lee presented their number in which Sam, as an AIDS patient in a trolley, speaks about the best day of her life to the music of 'When You Wish Upon A Star', whilst Lee goes through lots of ridiculous health and safety measures in the background.

It was funny because Lee undercut the sentimentality of Sam...but Philippe said that those who were laughing had bad taste and went on to prove it. He then led Lee to place the fake hand on the end of a long stick ("Sookie, will you hold my hand?") with real precision and care - not like the deliberately rough way it was done before.

"Every detail is well done to create something in the soul of the audience."

"We have to see the actor looking for something beautiful...everything has to be fantastic for us."

Philippe argued that before we were laughing at something crass, whilst now "we have an emotion." We see Sam and this sad image of her feeling the joys of human contact with a rubber glove on a stick and we feel something.

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Ben and Duncan presented a version of the 'Adam's masturbating' text in which they said their text fast and light to ild fashioned cabaret music whilst several Bouffons danced in the background. Every now and then a gun shot would bang and one of the Bouffons would drop to the floor dead. There was also a kind of Hitler figure upstage saying "that's no good, try harder" suggesting this performance was at a concentration camp and they were all trying to survive.

I was in this scene, and whilst we were rehearsing I was thinking it wasn't going to work because it was too much of an idea, but Philippe didn't mind it and suggested we work on it tomorrow in class. He actually said this or a few numbers, been though he had originally said there would be no showings on Friday.

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Yuichi presented a number about the lies in Japan.

He came on and shouted "Tsunami! Earthquake! Nuclear!" and then did an upbeat song and dance in Japanese about how the government are all liars. But he panicked half way through and didn't finish, and Philippe said no.

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Ben also tried playing the Fool from King Lear, who Philippe had said a while ago is a Bouffon character.

Ben had this "Hey Nunny Nunny" music, and spoke quite grand and royally whilst dressed like a jester. But Philippe said no because it was "too elegant."

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So many numbers presented on what we thought was the last day to present (which it basically was) but nothing got through. It is hard to present something of quality that is well thought out in a short amount of time! With pressure! But I suppose this is asked for in the 'real world' quite often...

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The show tonight was another good one. In fact our best so far. There was a really good feeling in the audience and everything ran particularly smoothly. Only one night to go until the end of the Bouffon workshop, and the end of two years at Gaulier for many people.

“What Do You Want To Say?”

Back to classes again today...which means more presentations to try and get into the show.

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Duncan and Sam presented a new version of Duncan’s text about society forgetting about mad people. Duncan was dressed like a middle-ages Bouffon, and he pushed Sam, dressed like an AIDS patient, in a trolley with a light inside it so they were all lit up. Philippe said“I like the image but I don’t like the text” but it’s not Bouffon. Really frustrating for Duncan cause he’s been trying desperately to get into the show that he was led to believe he was already in. Plus only now has Philippe mentioned anything wrong with the text...

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Christine, Lee, Mark and Charles presented a number commenting on society’s obsession with frivolous gossip instead of real important news issues. They were speaking about how recently the front page story on a newspaper was a ‘tweet’ from the ex-wife of a president, and a major story about the collapse of the Euro was shunted to the second or third page. 

In their piece Christine and Lee gossiped over a cup of coffee, whilst Mark and Charles, dressed like tramps, threw money into a rubbish bin and lit it on fire. Philippe said “No! I didn’t understand anything.” And neither did I. It wasn’t clear what they wanted to speak about in the performance. Philippe spoke about how nobody is throwing money in the bin. They might be gambling with it - taking risks - but nobody is lighting it on fire.

“You need to say something precise.”

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Tim and Lee presented the gossiping scene from No Son of Mine. “They are horrible, or I am drunk?...We don’t see them as friends.”

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Katy re-presented the America scene, even though it’s in the show, with a few adjustments. However the adjustments only made the piece longer and boring. So back to what they had before!

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Vicky and I presented a new idea for Brian and Hannah Tamaki. We spent a few hours working on it, trying to find a new way to kill him, and we decided to have them eat an expensive feast whilst talking about how they are just like all their Māori followers and that you don’t money and a nice house and electricity to be happy - all you need is Jesus. Essentially showing their wealth/greed whilst saying they understand how hard it is economically for their people. So this morning Vicky went to the supermarket and got heaps of food, including a roast chicken and chocolate mousse and popcorn and melon... 

And we showed the scene today, without having really rehearsed...or having had lunch. The showing didn’t work however. It wasn’t funny, or particularly shocking, or clear. Philippe said we don’t see Bouffon actors, we just see a big idea and two pigs. 

He spoke about how the image of food doesn’t take the audience immediately to the idea money. It takes us to food. Or fat people perhaps. I argued that poor Destiny Church followers could never afford a meal like this, but I get it, theatrically it doesn’t read. Today I came to understand more clearly the difference between an image and an idea. For Charles’ care home scene, we see him in bin. That’s an image. It says “look, in a way, we put old people in the bin.” But then they have an idea to talk about that image. They have tactics and fun to elaborate and destroy. Whereas with our scene today, we see food, and then we see us eat food. There is no surprise for the audience. 

Philippe also spoke to me about how I need to not be too much with the character. It has to be me - not a character, having fun through an imitation or action, to say fuck you and to destroy. To start, I should imagine I am a Bouffons - one of the people banished and spat on. And then imagine that Bouffon in front of 1000 of the people that banished me. And decide what it is I want to do to get those people. 

I think with Brian Tamaki I’ve fallen into a bit of a trap because I’m trying to get one man, not 1000 men. And I’m trying to talk about a mixture of money and religion. It’s not impossible. But what I showed today, and what I have presented the last few times, have gotten further and further away from destroying him and speaking about what I want to speak about. I was closest to him the very first time I presented him. When I had fun to make him look like an idiot, and then to undercut what he was preaching with laughter.

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Lee and Sam presented a new scene about HIV in which Sam sat in a trolley speaking about happy thoughts, whilst Lee in the background put a quarantine sign on her trolley and sprayed disinfectant from afar, and did other funny things suggesting he didn’t want to go near her. 

But then at the end they both laughed at the audience and the kissed each other and rubbed tongues with each other. Philippe said “not too bad” but that he didn’t love Sam, and “we have to love the actor.”

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Lee also presented a number in which he came out on stage to this Billionaire track that he’s used several times before (I’m not sure exactly why he chose to use it this time) and then imitated Tony Blair.

Whilst he imitated Blair, Charles would pop his head up from above the wings and say with a light laugh “war criminal”. Philippe said we don’t love Lee, and also it was unclear what the message was. “What do you want to say?”

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WEDNESDAY NIGHT SHOW:

We had another good show tonight. André and I did the best we’ve done yet, and my latin-babble walk-by bit is becoming lighter and more fun. It was a bit shorter tonight because Akron has decided to pull out of the show (there was a bit of drama just before we went on yesterday and he didn’t want to perform then). So the show is now only 40 mins or so, which is short. But what can you do? Philippe’s critique tonight: “Not too bad...I didn’t write anything.” He then said he’s not sure if that’s because he liked it, or because he was lazy. It’s because it was good! 

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We all got yellow envelopes today as well with official documents inside them. I got some pieces of paper that will help me if I need to get another French VISA - a bit boring for me - but many people received their diploma for completing the full two years at the school! Congratulations friends! I have to wait till the end of Clown at the end of the year for me.

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Charles also said something after the show tonight that made me think. He said he’d learned a lot from working with other people on numbers during this workshop, and he encouraged us to help each other and work as a team. This is something I haven’t done much of this workshop. And I tend not to do it so much outside of school either. I’m a bit of a loner when it comes to making work. I stick to myself. But I’d like to start working with others more. Tomorrow, I’m thinking about creating a dance number of Captain Cook to say fuck you to the colonialists of New Zealand. This will be me by myself trying to make a silly dance. But maybe I won’t do it. Maybe instead I’ll offer to help other pieces. Because I’m doing the Captain Cook thing now because I didn’t get round to it before. But rushing it now isn’t going to do it justice. And I’m not going to prove anything by doing it. I’ll test something. But I know that with time, I could make a good Bouffon scene saying what I want to say. And with only two days left with all my friends, maybe it’s better to get stuck in with people and relax and enjoy their company.

"You Have To Come With Another You."

A day off today finally! It seems ridiculous to say that now though, because we only have a few days of class last of this workshop anyway.

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Ben and I worked away on our preparation for our upcoming street show spectacular: The French Chefs.

From this...

To this!

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And then show number two tonight...which went really well! Perhaps even better than last night. Philippe said "not too bad."

He also warned those that are going to present things to try and get into the show tomorrow (me included): "you have to surprise us...to say 'Hey! I am alive!'...you have to present something new...you have to come with another you." In other words don't come on stage with the same old boring problems. Change!

Bouffon Show Number 1.

In class today we did a run through of the show. I'm in Two Faggots and now two walk-bys of my priest-latin-mumbo-jumbo. And the lead singer, along with Mia and Katy as my back-ups, in a Bouffon band which we put together today with the lyrics of 'Greetings' to the tune of Gotta Go Home by Boney M!

First show tonight and it went really well! There was a good feeling in the group and with the audience and everything went pretty smoothly (which was a bit amazing). At the end Philippe said "first [show] is not bad" and had very few notes.

Tech Sunday (Lots of Feelings)

Tech rehearsal today. There were works on the train lines this weekend so it took two and half hours to get to school - a train then bus then another train - so that was a bit of a bitch. And then four hours of lights and sound cues. Ay ay ay. But we did it. And we have the shape of the show for tomorrow night. To be honest I’m not that proud of the show we have this term. A lot of the work presented has been rushed and doesn’t represent the quality of the work we’ve done over the past ten weeks. I’m more disappointed in myself though, because I haven’t presented more. I’ve been flat out working with Ben on our The French Chefs show every morning, and then rehearsing in other big group numbers, that I haven’t had the time or energy to work on my own stuff. I wish I had nutted down a week or two earlier, because then I wouldn’t be in the situation I’m in now. I feel embarrassed because I don’t have as much to show for myself as others, and I also feel annoyed with myself because I don’t have a piece in the show that I really care about. I mean, I do care about the message in Two Faggots but I really care about the message in something regarding the colonisation of New Zealand, but I never got round to making anything. I think because I’m a bit scared of it. Or because I procrastinated. Or it’s a big challenge. I know I can do it later, but why didn’t I do it now? And I know I still have a week to make some more scenes or learn a new monologue, and in this time I could do something about colonisation, but I don’t feel a real urge to do it. And this has been my issue over the past three weeks. I haven’t felt a push to go go go. I’ve felt tired and have avoided committing to doing work. This is learning I guess though. This is what it’s like to feel a bit burnt out perhaps. Or a bit unmotivated. A bit blocked. And it’s hard to come out of. I don’t feel burnt out about The French Chefs though. I feel excited and driven, because I care about it and I can see where it can go. So that says something too. For me, it matters that I care about what I’m working on. I could go on in this post, because I’m feeling a lot of things at the moment - including the sadness that in five days my friends of two years will all be dispersing - but I’m going to finish up here. I’m going to do this last week, and try to relax a bit and enjoy the company of my friends. If I find the time, I will work on a few other numbers, but I’m going to try and do it not with the panic to get in the show (this isn’t so helpful) and instead do it with the joy of working with people I enjoy to work with and make something I care about and have fun with.

Class on Saturday

Philippe can’t teach this coming Tuesday, so instead we had class today...on Saturday...whoop dee doo!

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Mia presented a part of the ‘dickheads’ monologue in French but Philippe said “it’s not enough.”

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André presented his Pauline Hanson speech with Thomas playing the drums in the background. The piece is good, but it peaks too early and then continues to red line. So Philippe was trying to find something to help with that. He got André to say the text like a dumb Australian, as Adolf Hitler, and with Charles walking behind André as if he were an aboriginal. Finally he settled on having Tim join André at the end to sing a drunken-blokey rendition of Waltzing Matilda. He tried lots of different options, not knowing which one was going to work. “We have to try.”

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We presented a new version of the America number, this time focusing on the relationship between pro-life campaigners and pro-gun campaigners. 

In the piece, Sarah Palin announces that unborn babies should be given the right to bear arms as well, and then a brigade of fetuses march on stage, and eventually shoot each other screaming “oh my god he’s got a gun!” Philippe liked the end, so it’s selected, although in my opinion it shouldn’t be...yet. It’s still really rough and feels a bit third-form drama class to me in terms of quality.

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Sophia presented a monologue from the ‘dickheads’ text. It was really great, and I was really proud of Sophia. It was just her dressed as a strange mix between a tramp and a washed up model. She had great games: imitating Marilyn Monroe, a flight conductor, an american police intercom voice, and singing. She was strange and funny and lovable and alive. Really great. “For sure, yes.”

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Mia and Vicky presented their number with Mia blowing bubbles in the trolley whilst Vicky hits her head and speaks (in Swiss German) about something lovely. But we still don’t understand what’s going on. Not because of language, but because of the images and games. Philippe ended up getting Vicky to speak some appropriate text from the bible whilst he played operatic music behind her. It had a good feeling about it, but is still not really clear. I don’t know who/what they’re saying fuck you to.

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Duncan presented the text he’d written a while ago about mad people being shunted from society and forgotten about, which he plays dressed in a strait jacket. Philippe killed him saying it’s boring and wasn’t very helpful in giving Duncan a direction to go in. Duncan was pretty upset at the end of the day as he’d been led to believe that he had two numbers in the show, or at least one, and both had been discarded by Philippe.

Frustrating Friday

The Royal Wedding scene was shown again, this time taking into account the feedback that Philippe gave last time. They also included a bit at the end in which Kate Middleton dies in a car crash, finds herself in a strange new place, and Diana appears (me, as a transvestite, covered in blood, and with a dead baby hanging from my groin) and says “welcome to the family.” Philippe said now there were too many things in the number and it wasn’t clear. “We don’t see any actor. Just idea.” Philippe’s lack of good English doesn’t help, because he thought the scene was depicting the Queen’s Jubilee, when the text was clearly talking about William and Kate...but anyway!

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Mark, André, Steph, and Charles presented a new never-before-seen scene before directed by Thomas (they made it in secret!) which says fuck you to the recent trend in China for people to give their kidneys away in exchange for an iPad.

In the scene Charles is rolled in and tries to get out of the surgery but is denied because he already signed away his fate. The crazy Chinese surgeon goes ahead anyway cutting him up with a chainsaw and other tools, and at the end a kidney is pulled out...but the patient is dead. So the iPad isn’t given away after all. It was a good scene - light and clear - and Philippe said “we will work [it].” Apparently the number is based on a true story, and that there is a big market for selling kidneys and other body parts to the American market. Yuck.

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Ben and Duncan presented the “Adam’s masturbating” text but it was slow, sexual, and boring. Philippe then got ten Bouffon to sit around Ben and Duncan (who were on a chair) and laugh whilst Ben and Duncan said there text really fast and light. 


“It’s better with a lot of fun...It’s not serious serious...It has to be laughing laughing.”

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Mia, Vicky and Mark presented their Swiss number about the minorets. Mia and Vicky had great Swiss costumes, looking like an Oktoberfest couple, and they entered yodelling in harmony.

 It was very funny and we loved them. And then when Mark enters in drag and belly dances on the Swiss flag, it was a really great image. “We take it.”

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Duncan wanted to present his Jesus text from No Son of Mine but Philippe decided he should try it at the end of André and Sophia’s No Son of Mine scene like they had spoken about a while ago. But because everyone has been so busy they had never found a moment to rehearse it together, and André and Sophia hadn’t practiced since the last time they presented, so it understandably wasn’t the best performance. And of course Philippe said “not like this.” This was a frustrating moment for all because Duncan didn’t get to show how he had prepared, and André and Sophia had shown something they weren’t ready to show, and then they get told they’re bad. Well duh!

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Barbara presented her ‘dickheads’ text again but this time dressed normally, and played really normally. Just like herself. It was as if she’s given up on Bouffon and was just trying to be charming as herself. It was a strange choice. And like this as well, Philippe killed her. “Too boring.”

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Duncan and Sam also presented the number they’d done a while ago which Philippe said would be in the show. But Philippe changed his mind saying the piece is now “sentimental and boring”. He’d forgotten that a while ago he had said that even though the scene wasn’t fantastic, it was a great step for the two actors on stage in terms of their lightness and subtlety. So that was a big blow for Duncan.

“One Stone In Your Garden”

André and I re-presented our Two Faggots number today with updated lyrics.

Marriage is meant for a husband and wife,

and now those fucking homos want to live a normal life!

But marriage is sacred - it’s ours and not yours.

It’s ours! Not yours! Not yours!

We switched it so instead of playing gays happy to be gay, we played gays mocking people who are anti-gay and against gay marriage. But by the end we came out as ourselves saying we’d “love to burn in hell”, finishing the number with the first two bars of Here Comes the Bride whilst giving the finger to the audience. I was really happy with what we did. I felt secure, and confident that it says what we want it to say. After we presented Philippe said “Yes for this one...No problem”, which was a bit of a relief. I feel a bit more relaxed about having something in the show now.

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  Lee presented a speech of Tony Blair’s whilst trying to do the same thing he did in an improvisation once before where he got pushed around in a trolley and was put in the shit. But it didn’t work at all today. The game that was there before wasn’t there now. He rushed into telling Steph to move the trolley in a different way, and Steph made changes to the direction of the trolley too quickly. Philippe said Lee “plays too much” and is “better as an actor who leaves the stage.”

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Tim presented a number in which he mocked an Australian bastard politician. He had several transvestites pretending to be sheep on the floor, who baa’d “in the bush” at the end of each of his sentences. He had Sam as a sheep dog herding the sheep, and Tim himself, dressed as a transvestite with a cowboy hat on, said an anti-gay, anti-immigrants, political speech. But it was unclear what he was trying to say. “I see a big idea but no Bouffon fun...impossible to understand.”

“We have to see the Bouffon happy to say ‘the fucking immigrants make more than me’.”

Q: Should we talk about many things in a number, or just one? 

A: “It’s better to have one subject.”

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Sam presented a number she’d written for her AIDS Bouffon. She sat in a trolley and said in a low energy voice “nobody likes me...they’re so negative” whilst asking if anyone wants to play a game and coughing on playing cards before letting them drop on the floor. It was kind of interesting for a bit, but it was really heavy. “I hate her...she is militant...horrible.”

He then got her to sing a lullaby and worked on her to be lighter. He spoke to her about the importance of working on one thing at a time until you get it. “When you do it, it’s finished. It means if you do it one week [during the show] and it’s in your body then you can do something else.”

“If you succeed with that it’s one stone in your garden...you know ‘I can do that’ - it’s less panic in an audition.”

This made me think I need to do the dickheads monologue as my light Irish Oscar Wilde character. It’s a new way for me, and I don’t feel that comfortable there. It would be good for me to get that stone in my garden. And I’m here to learn new things. Not to do the things I’m already at good at - which in a way is what the Two Faggots number is.

“A new way to seduce people as an actor.”

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Akron presented another bizarre number with his Murray Antoinette character. “I don’t understand anything but I love when I don’t understand.”

“Really funny...a good quality...one hour with this idiot and we love you all the time - it could be great.”

Philippe directed Akron to add more action to the piece, because right now it’s mostly just talking, which becomes bla bla bla. “You say the same text but with action...it has to be the same level: text and the action of the actor.”

~

Steph presented her monologue again but still didn’t get what she had before. “You play Bingo, or what? He said she can’t just leave it up to chance and hope that one day she’ll get it. He ended up getting her to imitate a singer called Barbara and saying her text to the tune of Ma Plus Belle Histoire d’Amour.

“When you start to talk it’s a bit sentimental. But when you sing, it’s not.”

So now Steph is going to sing all her text for a while! To get used to the lightness. And get that stone in her garden.

~

After class Duncan asked Philippe about how he could graduate from a young Bouffon to a professional Bouffon. Essentially how to play other sorts of characters that he’s not able to at the moment. Philippe said “everybody is different. You could not be like him and he could not be like you.”

“It’s the same, but it’s different. It depends [on] you.”

“Go with the dream you give to spectators, not with something else.”

“You - your person - and the dream you give to spectators is really important.”

~

Philippe also spoke again about the importance of trying everything, even if you think it is a bad idea.

“You never say it’s a bad idea [so] I don’t try.”

“You have to try everything on the stage. Everything.”

"You Come To Say Something."

Christine presented a monologue from the 'dick heads' text but Philippe killed her for being boring. 

"She is not alive...we don't see she's happy...[that] she has fun."

"La we have a poor woman sad...and she has to be the opposite of sad."

Philippe got Christine to change out of her tramp costume and into something more 'pin-up'. She ended up wearing a blue and red sequined outfit with a blonde bob wig - she looked like a Moulin Rouge dancer! 

Then Philippe got André (her boyfriend) to sit on the edge of the stage and to gossip with Christine. Then he got her to say the text in this way. Like this she was much lighter and had more fun. "We see her."

~

In response to my questions about different interpretations of play texts Philippe spoke a little about the importance of doing what the writer says. Beckett says the tree is centre stage. So put it centre stage. If it's not centre stage, it's another play! "The writer give a frame. "You do it!" even if it presents problems..."it's funny to have a problem."

~

Mark, Sophia, Charles and Mike presented a slightly longer and spruced up version of their Happy Valley Care Home number with Charles in the bin, Mark as the spanish maid and Sophia as the visiting daughter. Mike featured in a cameo role as one of the old people who had recently died, and they sang the full version of When I'm Sixty Four at the end. They also added a great moment where Mark feeds Charles porridge like a mother feeding their young child with an aeroplane spoon. Charles got porridge all over his face!

It wasn't given the 'yes' yet (nothing really has yet...) but it will. There are just a few more tweaks it needs.

~

The apartheid/Africa number which Ben directed was presented, in which André said the text imitating Hitler, whilst an ensemble of Bouffons hunted him like tribal Africans. But it wasn't clear. 

"We have to understand. But we don't understand."

Ben said the text is subtle. It's hard to know from the speech that the guy is actually nasty.

"He's a bastard who uses subtlety...we have to show that."

Philippe then got André to improvise the text of a commercial for White'n'Shine Toothpaste. 

And whenever Philippe beat his drum the rest of the Bouffons on stage, who were busy brushing their teeth whilst smiling, had to hoik and spit. Then André said the apartheid text with the same cheesy voice and rhythm and the ensemble still spat on command. Like this it was clear they 'spit' on this guy.

"It's important we understand the chorus says 'we shit on this text'."

~

Steph presented her 'the time for asking has passed' monologue again, trying to be beautiful they way she was the last time Philippe worked with her. But she was boring this time.

"You are untrustable...you are like Lee." = meaning she can do it one day and the next she can't.

"We have to see she has the devil in her body."

~

"A theatre teacher, he says: 'Ah we love you now, and ah we hate you now."

~

Mia and Vicky also re-presented their scene with the bread and wine of jesus. But the box of crackers split open at the bottom and so crackers went everywhere. It was quite funny, and they kind of made it work, but it still wasn't clear what they were trying to say.

"You come to say something."

“If You Pretend You Don’t Have Anything To Say You Will Be Much Stronger.”

I presented my Brian Tamaki number today. This time with an ensemble of Bouffons coming on to present the various different items Brian was telling, with laughing, and with some ‘karanga-d’ lines by Hannah Tamaki. I put it together with everybody in the hour before class - because that was the time I could have everyone - and I figured it was worth showing now to test the writing and the general shape before working on it anymore.

Unfortunately it bombed big time. “A big shit.” Philippe said it was not like how I did it before (I fell out of the ‘hoary Maori’ voice and went more into TV personality), and that I didn’t have enough fun. We couldn’t see the Bouffon pleasure to blaspheme in my eyes, and so we believe that I really could be Brian Tamaki. We don’t think I destroy him. We think I am him. Philippe also said “we didn’t see anyone” meaning not me, or Hannah, or the Bouffon ensemble, had a real moment. 

Philippe said we see my idea to destroy, but not my fun. It was “not nasty enough”. “Realist...Observational.” For a while in his feedback I felt like he wasn’t giving me any guidance on where to go, rather he was just telling me it was all bad. Because I asked whether it was an acting problem or a writing problem or what. And he kind of brushed over it saying it was everything. And that’s not so helpful to hear when you’re trying to gauge where to go next. But Philippe eventually said I should go more in the direction of money. To show “his money nightmare.” To make a scene which destroys Tamaki by showing him abuse his church’s money. And he said I need a really strong image. Perhaps create a scene with Brian sitting next to God on a giant pile of money. Or with Brian and Hannah on the glass-bottomed speedboat they own. Or Brian and Hannah counting their money and doing online shopping. I’m not sure yet. But something really nasty! 

I spoke to Philippe after and he said what I presented is not the show. It’s around the show. But it’s not the show. 

“You need to go somewhere [where] we see the Bouffon.”

“If you want to go to money you have to go far to the image of money.”

So that’s good learning. Now to find the show...

~

Ben presented a number in which he mocked Tony Blair and his famous ‘forty five minutes’ scandal. 

It was unclear for the average spectator who he was destroying. “Me, I don’t know it’s Blair and I am a normal spectator.” 

“If you pretend you don’t have anything to say you will be much stronger.”

“If you have something important to say you have to say it really with a filter [of] fun fun fun. If you are not, it’s militant. And if you are militant you are boring.”

In order to help Ben be lighter, and to approach Bouffon less from an actor being a character and more just imitating with fun, Philippe ended up getting four guys to get up and say the 45 minutes text as gays. In this way, with the rhythms and gestures, it starts to make the text ridiculous. A wee way through that exercise Ben started making fart noises to distract Mark whilst he was saying the text. Surprisingly (because usually Philippe says fart jokes are only for dumb Australians) he got each of us to sit centre stage and say the text as a gay whilst another person made fart noises (me) from backstage. 

“It’s an intelligent way to shit on his speech.”

~

Mia, Thomas, Charles and Mark presented their number with the French and Austrian fascists dancing at a ball. He spoke about how we need to see the two tramps dancing in the middle in a non-realist way. 


“When we see them like a realist person it doesn’t work.”

~

Barbara presented a monologue from Philippe’s writing in which Eve calls Mary on the telephone. She did the whole thing, which was a flop (in terms of laughs at least) and then at the end left the stage and didn’t come back. She’s having a hard time at the moment.

~

At the end of class Philippe spoke about the difference between playing as an actor and playing as a Bouffon. 

“As an actor you give life. You don’t mock...But with Bouffon you mock...You judge...You criticise.”

~

By the way: this man, Dieudonne, is doing some amazing Bouffon stuff at the moment:

"When It's Perfect..."

Presentation week has begun...and it’s going to be never-ending! We have class on Saturday (because Philippe can’t make it to school next Tuesday) and Sunday (for a tech rehearsal of the show), and then a week of performances. People are rehearsing madly before class, and we’re all booking each other in for group rehearsals.

~

Mia presented a monologue from La Compote in French. Philippe worked with her for a long time trying many different things. He led her to be more intimate and with the audience. But also to have dynamic rhythms that keep us interested.

~

André and Sophia presented a scene from No Son of Mine in which God and the Holy spirit bitch about Jesus and conspire to have him killed. Sophia played God by imitating Margaret Thatcher, and André played a gay American ass-licker. Philippe led Sophia to be more in a bad mood and suggested André play more of a slimy door-to-door salesman. 

He said the characters need to have a good connection together because “they are good friends” and that their scene is “possible, but the rhythm is not yet good.”

~

Charles, Mark and Sophia presented a short scene criticising how the world deals with old people these days by throwing them into care homes. Charles, dressed like a tramp, played an man in a rubbish bin. Mark, dressed as a transvestite, played a Spanish maid (brilliant). And Sophia, dressed as a tramp, played Charles’ not-caring daughter. The scene involved the maid preparing Charles for a visit by his daughter, which was quick and shallow, and then it ended with the maid putting a big log on top of the bin to prevent Charles from getting out. It was short - “it’s quick” - but we loved them. Philippe said we could have a bit more and got them the maid and daughter to sing a song at the end. They sang When I’m Sixty Four . 

It worked really nicely, especially when we could hear Charles trying to sing along inside the bin.

~

Akron and Yuichi presented an absolutely bizarre scene in which Akron played a prime minister talking about how boring his days were and Yuichi served him tea. Philippe said “I am not against...what you do is a bit bizarre...but I don’t say no...But you have to know you are bizarre...Both of you.”

“For a moment without meaning in the show...why not?”

~

Mia and Vicky also presented a number in which Vicky came out pushing Mia (dressed a bit like a baby) in a trolley. Vicky spoke in Swiss German about good parenting (or something like this) whilst hitting Mia on the head. They had a great effect where they made it sound like Mia’s head was really banging against the metal of the trolley. Then afterwards the scene changed and Vicky kind of became a priest and fed Mia bread and wine whilst Mia spoke about things she won’t do in her life because of the Bible.

Philippe said “I didn’t understand...[but] it’s not horrible.”

He talked about how in their scene there were two things: when Vicky hits Mia, and when Vicky feeds Mia, and that they needed to make them clearer.

~

Nothing was given the ‘yes’ to be in the show today. Instead Philippe kept saying people should continue working on their scene and to present “when it’s perfect.” Yikes!