"Guy, I Would Work With You...I Would Say You Need To Be Less Secure...It Means A Bit Less Pretentious...But You Have A Good Quality."

Last day of the Bouffon workshop today. And the last day of a two year journey for many of us too.

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Lee and Sam presented their When You Wish Upon A Star AIDS scene again but this time with adjustments from yesterday's direction towards showing more beauty. But this time, without the fun rhythm that Lee had in the background, it felt sentimental and boring. Philippe said "it needs a style" which he clarified as meaning "we recognise it's not like in the street."

[It means] "I have something special because you are in the room."

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Tim tried his Farewell song again with more stillness and subtlety. But it was "too boring." It's such a fine line going from beautiful and sensitive to slow and boring.

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Duncan and Sam tried the Eve and the Devil text again, this time fast and 'happy' - with Sam eating an apple and them laughing together.

But it wasn't accepted as it was "not subtle at all."

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Mike also scored himself a 'passage' - a quick scene walking across the stage. He comes on, stops and says "Toronto is not Miami", and then walks off. Yay for Mike!

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At the end of class Philippe spoke to each of us individually like he did at the end of last year (this was requested by one of us). It was awkward though. The whole last day was a bit awkward with Philippe really. And he didn't remember how he had spoken last year. And he suggested that he could say who in the class he would have in his company if he had a theatre company, which we decided we didn't want! Not at the end of two years! Say something nice! He ended up speaking about each one of us as actors and where we are at, and for some he said whether he would have us in his company or not.

"Guy, I would work with you...I would say you need to be less secure...it means a bit less pretentious...but you have a good quality."

pre·ten·tious   /priˈtenCHəs/

Adjective: Attempting to impress by affecting greater importance, talent, culture, etc., than is actually possessed.

For some people, at the end of two years training they are still feeling lost and unsure of themselves as actors. 

"Crisis is good...the best job for crisis is theatre."

That can totally happen at this school. It's not one to build you up and let you fly when you graduate. It's not a nurturing kind of place like some other drama schools. This one is tough and honest. And that can be good for learning, but it can also be really hard when you're trying to gain confidence in yourself.

"You have to work a lot to learn the job."

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The show tonight was another good one. There was a really nice, proud, and together feeling and we went out with a bang. 

After class we had some celebratory drinks and nibbles upstairs. There were a few speeches (Philippe joked that he would think of all of us for the rest of his life) and then wham it was all over. Very sudden. It was strange to end so abruptly. There was no stretched out graduation week like I had at Toi Whakaari. And we didn't really have any ritual to say thank you and goodbye. We did have a nice get together as a company before we played the last show, but it was very short. And then after the show we did have a kind of ritual by all partying on the train on the way to drinks by the Seine. But it was hard to find a fitting way to mark the end of this two year journey for many of us. Partly because the group who have done the whole two years are relatively small compared to the whole group. Most of the group have only been here for the year, or even just one workshop. So unfortunately the end wasn't marked very well. But in a way that is to be expected at a school like this. A school that thrives on fun and spirit, but ignores feelings and emotion. It's odd for me as well because I'm not done yet. I have three months off and then I'm back for one last workshop: Clown. So I find myself saying goodbye to a lot of close friends and reminiscing about the past two years, but I'm not saying goodbye to the school. I'm back in October. But I know that the school I return to will not be the same school anymore. Because the people won't be there - it will be a completely new group. Which is exciting! But also sad. Because I love the people I've trained with over the past two years. We have become close friends, and shared many memorable moments. 

But this is the life of somebody who works in the theatre I suppose. We come together for a certain amount of time and then we all split off again and go in different directions. There is always a goodbye.  And although it will be almost impossible to get everybody in the same room again (although there is talks of a ten year reunion in Paris!) now I have a bunch of friends situated all over the world who I can go and visit and call on when I need help! So thank you my core group of friends who I have done the two years with - André, Christine, Mia, Vicky, Katy, Sophia, Thomas, Stephanie, Mike - it's been incredible.

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Things I've Learnt From Bouffon:

• Say something - and be clear about what you want to say.

• Use tactics - seduce your audience and then pull the carpet from underneath them.

• Be nasty and go far - and then go further...destroy!

• Blaspheme and be vulgar - but do it with a purpose.

• Show yourself, your beauty and your humanity -  not a character or an idea.

Another really inspiring workshop. I've never done something quite like Bouffon. It's raw and political and powerful. It feels new and fresh and exciting. Something I definitely want to use in my work in the future.

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And now three and half months off before Clown. First up I'm going to Leeds to direct Ben, Lee, and Steve in a comedy version of Macbeth. Then Amanda and I are off to Berlin (where we'll see Rosie), Prague, Vienna (where we'll hang with Thomas), Edinburgh (for a week of the Fringe Festival), and then a month working in Montesquieu-Volvestre at a HelpX apple orchard.

Montesquieu-Volvestre

I'm also running a workshop with Ben in Burley-In-Wharfedale, as well as doing two weeks of our new street show The French Chefs at the Pompidou, which we did our first trial run-through for the public just recently.

À Octobre!