Day Three - "Nobody Recognises Me = The Engine Of This Workshop"

Feel a bit bla today. I got up and went to 'Guerisols' (secondhand shop) for the second day in a row, to look for a costume for my character. I didn't really know what to look for, and there's so much stuff that looks fairly ordinary, so it was a bit overwhelming. I did think to literally cover my face and distort my body so that I physically cannot be recognised. So I got two big puffy jackets (which made me look odd and round) and put a beanie on my head and wrapped a scarf around my neck that also covered my mouth and nose. It kind of made me feel like a goofy Canadian. 

When it came to class we all had to go up on stage and model our new outfits and then Philippe made comments on them. He said mine was limiting but that we will work with it today. I agreed really. I just felt lost to what I should be looking for. After having dinner and a huge chat with Dimitra (from Greece) it has occurred to me that having nobody recognise me is actually a metaphor and that its about how I act and what my presence is rather than what I look like. So I feel a bit durr! right now.

In class today we were set the scenario of having one character as a hotel manager and another character enter as a customer looking for a room. I got up in the first group of four, and tried to come out open and see what happens. I entered the stage (after Philippe's three drum beats) to find Bijan (an Israeli actor from London) in a nurse outfit, and he said something to me in french. I immediately yelled at the top of my lungs "I DO NOT SPEAK FRENCH" and suddenly became this angry agressive fat man. The scene died pretty quickly and we both were killed by Philippe soon after. Then that was all I got to do today, which was a bit disappointing. I feel pressure to 'get it right', or find the right costume now, or be the star student, which are all unneccesary and unhelpful feelings. I need to take my time, go at my own pace and just learn from myself, and from others. In fact, I feel like I'm learning huge amounts about myself - about my tendencies as a performer, especially when under pressure. And I'm learning lots from watching others as well.

One thing I thought was interesting that Philippe got a lot of actors to do today was to perform as if the audience were deaf (i.e. very loud speaking). This suddenly brought the characters from a mediocre everyday kind of place, to an extreme and colourful new place. The life of the stage perhaps. He also wanted people to make real entrances. BAM. I'm on - here I am. And then he spoke about actors sharing the game - it's my turn, now it's your turn - you're in major, you're in minor etc. Simple, and something I have read and heard before, but its importance was incredibly obvious in these two hander scenes. In order for the actors to have complicite together they need to share the weight of the scene. Each catches a wave whilst the other prepares for the next.

Something I forgot to make a note of yesterday was that sometimes if an actor isn't really finding the pleasure they need on stage Philippe will get one or two people up on stage with the actor, and he'll get them to slowly kiss the actors neck, whilst the actor has to keep going on with his business. This creates a wonderful ticklish and giggly feeling which is absolutely joyous to watch. Very contagious. Fast track to pleasure - get somebody to kiss your neck!

Another thing that I thought was really cool was something that Dimitri said when I was talking to her about her experience at Le Coq and then at Ecole Philippe Gaulier. Dimitri left Le Coq after one term after seeing a showing of the second year's work at Ecole Philippe Gaulier. She said at Le Coq there is a real sense of ensemble and of company, and that the show really feels as one. However at Ecole Philippe Gaulier all the actors on stage are stars. They all shine. This is not to say either is better or worse, but I really like that Philippe is working towards finding the light within every individual actor. So when you put them all together there is an overwhelming gleam. And this is one of my working questions for this secondment: What makes me shine? Me special as an individual performer. I feel I am in safe hands towards discovering this.

I feel a bit worried about tomorrow because I don't know what costume is right for me. Dimitri says to look within myself, but I don't really know where to look. She says What am I passionate about? Barbershop? A Barbershop costume? Non. LOST? Dress up as a Polar Bear? Non. I know this is silly but I have trouble listening to myself and finding what I want to express. Even though I desperately want to. I think I might explore my sexuality once again. That is something that I enjoy and feel that I've still got lots to explore - in a theatrical way. So maybe I'll go find a leather outfit tomorrow. Yuck. The characters so far that have worked have been very simple and logical in appearance, and the life brought to the costume has been different from what we might read initially from first sight. I guess to be the same as what we see at first sight would be to be heavy, to underline, and it would be boring.

Another day. Explore. Risk. Have fun. And look at and feel the audience! I'm hiding from them and we all know it!

Some photo's from dinner:

Lovely Dimitra from Greece.

'Rue Houdon' - apparently quite a touristy restaurant but fantastic BIG salads and a very good waiter! Quick, cool, and accommodating. One of those really good efficient restaurant guys that we wish we had in New Zealand!

A few internet dictionary definitions of "complicite/complicity" which I think are fun:

The state of being complicit; involvement as a partner or accomplice, especially in a crime or other wrongdoing; 
en.wiktionary.org/wiki/complicity

An individual is complicit in a crime if they are aware of its occurrence, have the ability to report the crime, but fail to do so. ...
en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Complicit

complicit - Involved in or compliant with some behavior, especially some activity of a questionable nature
en.wiktionary.org/wiki/complicit

Knowingly sharing your work for someone else's benefit.
info.saintleo.edu/COL/Students/Glossary.cfm