"Give Your Fantasy With Pleasure To Your Character And We Will Follow You."

Today were Hollywood extras auditions. Come in as your character and perform a 'prepared' scene.

When I went I fell into a pompous British voice again, too loud and too heavy.

"This character is starting to be really bad...the costume...the actor..."

I did some Shakespeare ("to be or not to be" - which has since been banned from the school since everyone did it) and I was heavy again, although I played a bit with rhythm which went alright for the brief time I survived. But Philippe killed me quickly: "You're heavy and you underline...you don't exist in our minds...either you decide to be light or you change your character."

He moved on to others but then came back to me, and got me to imitate Rodrigo, then Thomas the movement teacher, and finally Anna. All people who are light, and effeminate (interesting because I know I'm free when I play gay or a woman). "You're much better as Anna than your shitty acting."

I was a bit gutted to hear I may have to change character, because a) I feel like a bit of a failure for having to change at this point (although who actually cares? I'm here to discover!) and b) I'd like to do a show looking similar to the character I have at the moment. At half time I asked him about this - is it impossible for me to play this character? He had said to some actors he had doubts about their characters and I wanted to know what that meant. He said he's looking for characters/costumes that free the actor - that allow them to play and discover. And different things work for different actors. He said sure I could play a character that looks the way I look, but I have to play him MY way. The way that gives me pleasure and freedom. And right now I don't feel free with what I'm doing. I feel constrained and trapped. I'm also struggling to give life and play when I feel I have to be gentle and light...but that's another issue. Philippe also said I "want too much" which is true, it holds me back majorly, and is something I keep on having to learn to move past.

~

"My fun around the character is what you show."

Philippe got Victoria to speak louder. She asked "can you not hear me" and he said "It's not what I hear, it's what you give. We hear, but you don't give enough impulse." She ended up finding a great Russian spy character. "This could be good...if you have fun."

"If you are a small character you have to be sometimes big...The actor is big and he has the fun to play a small character...An actor is never small even when he plays a small character..."

"Don't be small. Every actor is large. Every actor is beautiful even if he plays Richard III."

Andre has been struggling to find freedom as the Asian student character he's playing. "If we say: Ah! He has good fun to be Japanese then it's okay." The success of a character comes down to the amount of pleasure an actor gets from playing it.

"In a way, it's your pleasure that decides [the character]"

"You have to give so many possibilities to your character, and if you have pleasure we will follow you."

"A human being can be in so many ways."

"Give your fantasy with pleasure to your character and we will follow you."